Archive for the ‘Argh!’ Category

Trying to Reason with Hurricane Season

Thursday, September 16th, 2010

As of today, we’re about 2/3 of the way through the “mean season”…I always figure if we can make it to October 1st without a major hassle, we’re home free.  Although every once in a while we get a “bad” storm after October 1st (Wilma on October 26, 2005 rolled us at Cat 3).

There are currently 3 hurricanes out there….the fierce and “classic” looking Igor, which is spinning harmlessly in the middle of nowhere, but headed, possibly, toward Bermuda.  I hope it misses.  And Hurricane Julia, a storm which will apparently never bother a living soul.

And, unfortunately, between the Yucatan and Mexico proper, is Hurricane Karl, which looks like it will impact the Mexican mainland sometime Saturday.  It’s forecast to come ashore somewhere between Pozo Rico and Veracruz….an area which we travelled both on the outbound and homeward bound legs of our trip.

If you look at Weather Underground’s “WunderMap” (not sure how long this link will be good), and zoom in, you can see the map of the area.

On our trip down, we drove from Tampico with the idea of staying in Pozo Rico….alas, there were no rooms in town as it was a festival weekend…so we drove on down the coast.  And ended up along the “Emerald Coast”…as this stretch is known (in a tiny family hotel called, oddly enough, the “Hotel California”). 

Currently, it appears that the entire Emerald Coast is in the cone.  Bummer.

It is a beautiful stretch of coast, where the road is within sight of the beach for many miles.  The lots along the beach are very large, and there are many old vacation homes and small, family hotels, mixed in with agricultural pursuits.  It’s a vacation spot for the locals, not a big resort area like Cancun.  In fact, it really reminded me of the Atlantic coast of Florida years ago, before we were overrun by a zillion snowbirds. 

Flat land, smelly (and full of cool marine life) little mangrove brackish water estuaries, a couple of big rivers emptying into the Gulf of Mexico, a multitude of towering palm trees (Jamaican Talls, which all died off in Florida years ago from lethal yellowing)….and really cool shack-like beach restaurants.  Beautiful turquoise water.  Numerous roadside stands…we jumped off the road at one point to buy coconut cookies from one of the roadside vendors.  (These didn’t make it past Houston….where we were summarily relieved of said cookie/candy confections by a certain greedy young lady). 

Crossing a River, Southbound on the Emerald Coast, Looking Inland

Lucky calves...under a Pink Tabebuia Tree (apparently native)

Coastal Highway on the Emerald Coast of Mexico

Coastal Highway on the Emerald Coast of Mexico

As you can see from the pictures, the land is very flat for a few miles right along the coast, then the mountains rise up to the west.  It is an absolutely beautiful place (although that particular road was one of the worst in Mexico….but it was being repaired and was much better on the return trip).  As I recall, on the trip down it was citrus harvest, we saw hundreds of trucks full of fruit, and a zillion stands selling jugo de naranjo (orange juice), as well as many trucks full of harvested sugar cane.

I am pained by the thought of this beautiful place being directly in the path of a hurricane…it’s almost as if it’s headed right for me.  Let us hope that it’s a minor hurricane, and that the residents are well prepared and stay safe. 

I hate hurricane season.

~ Blonde Gator

Blonde Mom is Doing Better…and Other Stuff

Tuesday, August 24th, 2010

Mom’s in a rehab facility, and sees the ortho on Thursday.  She’s able to get up and around, with help, the fractured pelvis is painful.  We’re hoping she’ll be able to come home in a week or so.   As always, her attitude is great and we spend more time laughing than reasonable people should, so I’m optomistic.

We had our primaries in Florida today…looks like Marco & Allen are on their way!   Happiness.  Interestingly, the lady at the polls said there “were alot of angry voters”.  Hmmmm. 

I have yet to start sorting out all of my photos (argh!) and have had to restore my computer (yet again) and have lost my video conversion software.  The HD video camera uses an MTS format, which is not compatible with anything at all….so…must upload and then reformat.  I have high hopes for continuing my blog about our trip…just have to put my nose to the grind stone and do it.  I’m going to replace my Panasonic camera next month…yay!

I’ve already cooked a pork butt since we’ve returned.  In Houston, I spent some time w/Iguana Man’s daughter, teaching her some of my cooking tricks.  (And hitting Wally World for pots & pans, bowls, a cutting board, food processor, and other sundry cooking stuff).  We had a blast!  So now she has pot roast and pulled pork in her repetoire.  It’s a little frustrating sharing cooking long distance, but I have an idea for Food Network!  I’ve more or less caught up on Bravo’s Top Chef (although I almost puked when Nanny Pelosi showed up). 

I also stocked up on dried peppers in Houston, anchos, New Mexico Reds, chipotles, and some spicy little red ones.  I still have my Guatemalan chocolate…so perhaps I shall give mole a try one of these days.  I’ve upped the “hot meter” during my time in Central America, and am removing fewer and fewer pepper seeds as I cook.  Some like it hot….I’m liking it hotter.  :)

Life is good.

~ Blonde Gator

A Vacation from the Vacation

Friday, July 23rd, 2010

Well, my blog, to date, has been totally about this wonderful adventure, and not about my political beliefs.

Until now.

Seems the leftists in the media DON’T LIKE THE COMPETITION….we evil bloggers are pre-empting “real” journalism.  The Horror!!!   *cue evil laugh*.

So….naturally, they cry for some sort of government oversight.  Bloody hell!  (emphasis mine)

Phillips wanted to go even further, asking if “there’s going to come a point where something’s going to have to be done legally” about anonymous bloggers.

Hey dummy!  You fakirs are going to have to pry my computer out of my cold, dead hands before I give up the right to say what I want, out here on the internet, where anyone at all can see it.  You liberals don’t have the monopoly on free speech…nor do you have the ability to impinge upon mine.

We are getting into dangerous territory in the U.S.  Be afraid, be very afraid…the leftists are next going to assault our right to free speech.

~ Blonde Gator

In Puerto Escondido

Saturday, July 17th, 2010

And it’s hotter than the hammers of hell, here. 

I don’t know whether it’s just me, or a reaction to the stress of our little caper, but I haven’t been too eager to go walkabout.  Iguana Man, thankfully, has picked up the slack.

We plan to be here for another two weeks or so, I must get my game face back on and get motivated to get out and about.  But it is rather comforting, to be back in “our old room”, in a totally unthreatening place, with internet, and all the comforts of home.  

I guess that little border incident rattled me more than I’d like.  We’ve met quite a few interesting people here, we bid “adieu” to our French neighbors today, the husband a Cordon Bleu trained pastry chef…they’re ultimately headed to Istanbul!

Anyhoo….life is good.  Still working on videos and pictures….some of them should be stellar (I hope).  More later.

~ Blonde Gator

Charmant…..

Tuesday, July 13th, 2010

I just happened to notice this linked on Drudge.

Iguana Man has been insistent that we maintain a schedule in regard to applying the OFF (containing DEET at 7% or better)…and after only one or two bites, I agree wholeheartedly. 

Senor Iguana has contracted Dengue once….which, he says, is more than enough for a life time.  Troublesome, though, that it is making its way back to Florida.

We’ve also been vigilent about spraying our room(s) with bug spray to ensure all of the critters are dead (I got my blood sucked almost dry in Honduras on the way down, ish!). 

A word to the wise…..one can’t be too careful!

<edit>  An update….seems Dengue is the real deal…here’s an article to help you with precautions.

~ Blonde Gator

Screwing “La Systema”

Saturday, July 10th, 2010

Well…it’s been a week ago (yesterday) since I’ve blogged (although I wrote a nifty piece from Granada, Nicaragua, which I couldn’t get to upload)…and do I have news!

We left Costa Rica a week ago, and have had a pretty nice road trip thus far.  We had a bit of a whoopdee at the Costa Rican border, seems we were “missing” a paper (que’lle crap)….which took a hundred dollar+ bribe to fix.  Short letter to follow to Costa Rica Immigration, I have the name of the asshat who jacked us.    I’m convinced 95% of the border cops in Latin America are corrupt.

Before I go on my rant…let me say that my take on Nicaragua changed drastically after seeing the country during the rainy season…it transformed from a drab, dusty, awful place to a beautiful paradise.  On the advice of our friend, we stopped in the colonial town of Granada.  It was fabulous.  Unfortunately, we were once again bitten by the “festival bug”….we had a room in a lovely hotel for one night, but after that…no room to be had at the inn, nor anywhere else in town….some sort of “Eco Festival” was happening.   So, we just didi’d and went to Honduras (I’ll write more later about that).  If you’re dying for a preview, check out COPAN.

We had a bit of an adventure in Guatemala (sarcasm on full throttle)….First, we got lost, and found a nice postman who had a much better map than we did.  He directed us to go the direct route, through the mountains, rather than around.  At about 4,500 feet, and on dirt roads, we only got more lost once (but we did find a great camp ground) we managed to finally (2 hours later) find the road we were looking for.  It was actually pretty fun, but would have been alot more fun if I had been driving…but I digress.  I LOVE MY XTERRA.

As I’ve mentioned before, there is not a great way to “get there from here” in some of these mountainous countries.  On our first pass, we drove through Guatemala City….NOT NICE!  So we decided that was something to be avoided at all costs…which we did, by driving G-7, which was, as we were told, “terra for the first hour…paved after that”.

Well….”dirt” was about 5,000 feet, mountain roads, and the recent storms were apparent, with rockfalls and dirtfalls and washed out roads everywhere.  The scenery was awesomely beautiful…but it was a scary trip in the right seat.  Iguana Man deserves a Purple Heart for surviving my screaming.   I promise to post some pics and video (when I figure out how to do that)….you’ll not believe it at all.  I still can’t. 

Okay, back to my original point.  GOVERNMENTAL INCOMPETENCE IS EVERYWHERE!

When we tried to leave Guatemala on Wednesday, we were told that our car was not in their “systema” as having ever left Guatemala.  Never mind we had our paperwork with the exit stamp from Agua Caliente (Hot Water…I should have known!!!).   Further evidence of our car being out of the country would be like….entry Visa into Honduras (in my passport….I wrote about this earlier with the sisterly solidarity of the female immigration officer insisting the car be on my passport), Nicaragua papers, Costa Rican papers….and reverse the trip….CR, Nico, Honduras.

BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Iguana Man tells me there is a basic bureaucrat mindset (I think he’s correct, BTW)….a simple “yes or no” answer from a paper pusher has drastic consequences.  I was furious (!!!), but Iguana Man’s experience prevailed (thankfully)….and he didn’t go ballistic as I’d have done…and the Aduana (cop) let us leave the border with our car.

You see, in Latin America, they use “Napoleonic Law”….which means, mas o menos (more or less)….lock ‘em up now, and sort it out later. 

SOOOO….even though, we had transmigrated Guatemala the first time, correctly, and had all of the appropriate stamps, paperwork, etc…..some moron didn’t enter us into their computer system.  And the poor little government drone knew that, but didn’t have the authority to fix it…all he could do was say “NO….can’t leave”….and we found the one honest guy in the country.  Actually, he was very nice, as I said about the Napoleonic laws here, he could have impounded our car and been done with it…and sorry, American Tourist…you must pay 50% of the Blue Book value of your car to get it back…if you can find it?

SOOOO….we turned around, and went back to HueHue (I know, great name!!!).  We checked into a nice hotel I saw on the way out of town (after we’d earlier spent a night in a cute little hotel downtown, $12, but the water wasn’t turned on due to ”issues”…LOL, it was just a fine place, more later). 

We called the American Embassy, got some advice (note to travellers, Embassy staff aren’t ALL morons, but most of them are).  We were referred to a tax guy, rather than an abrogado (shyster).  He was such a nice man, as was the fellow at the hotel who helped translate, a man who is married to a Nebraskan, but is properly waiting out his two years to get his green card, God Bless legal immigrants!!!). 

After two days of trying to get the paperwork fixed, our “fixer” suggested another way out….ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION!

So, this morning, we hotfooted across the Guatemal/Mexico border, down a back dirt road, where there were numerous trucks and cars coming and going.  Needless to say, I was scared out of my wits.

We got into Mexico…and with the good sense of our “tax advisor”….we were about 3 KM from a town with customs…where we presented our paperwork, and became legal once again. 

So….I suppose the moral of the story is never panic, never be rude (the Guatemalan customs guy was just as captured by his “systema” as we were).  NEVER BE RUDE.  If it had been me, talking to the customs guy, I’m sure he’d have impounded the car, because I’d have gone ballistic at the stupidity.  But the Iguana Man finessed the situation, and we are now in Mexico (did I mention it feels like coming home?  Because it does…the US media deserves to be shot over their coverage of Mexico…alas, I digress again).

Actually, it was kind of fun (and lots of scary) running the border.  But, when all is said and done, I feel like I just shot a huge bird at bureaucrats everywhere.  We’ll never be allowed to bring another car into Guatemala (like I care)….although I have to think their “systema” sucks so badly that it doesn’t matter one iota.  I have to give them a hat tip for trying to rip me off for $10 grand….but so solly, estupidos!

After all is said and done, I have to think, SCREW THE SYSTEMA is the right tack to take….sometimes it’s a little more scary than not, and sometimes, it just is what it is.  It’s been a pretty fine life lesson.  Do you hear me, Obama…and you stupid democrat Critters? 

~ Blonde Gator

My Camera Issy Doomboo

Saturday, May 29th, 2010

Curses!  The trusty Panasonic croaked last night…we’re not sure whether it’s the battery, or the camera.  We’ve been having internet issues until this a.m. (thank you kind neighbors Jack & Penny for letting us tap your network)…we are now back up.  So perhaps I can find the solution on the internet.  The display just kind of went *poof*.  Battery is charged…if anyone has any ideas, I’m all ears.

We’re having the neighbors in tonight for Mexican.  I got a big pork butt from the butchers and roasted it yesterday, pulled it this a.m.  We’re having pork enchiladas, salad, beans and rice, mucho cervesas, some vino courtesy Dominic, and perhaps even some mango daquiris.  My mom brought her camera, so I hope to have pics later.

Must run, the kitchen is awaiting!

~ Blonde Gator

An Update

Thursday, April 22nd, 2010

Well…finally we’ve locked in our lodgings…until July 4th (good day, eh?….sorry, evil Canuck influence).

What I mean to convey is that we now have our housing arrangements, thankfully, arranged to my satisfaction (basically this means BIG bed, A/C, internet….as well as conveniences like access to a washing machine).   In the short term…a rather nice 2/1 apartment up the pike close to the beach, and for the longer term, a great 3/3 house (with its own pool) until July 4th.

And therein is the fly in the ointment.  It used to be that an extension for a vehicle (an extra 90 days) was automatic.  However, for some odd reason, the government of Costa Rica, which is “trying” to make tourism easy….has up’d their “rules” for cars.  We’re hearing bad things….like if you go over your 90 days they’ll “nationalize” your vehicle (i.e. charge you ten grand to get it back). 

NOT SO FAST, says I.  So before any further commitment to stay here, we must check this out thoroughly.  Which will entail a lot of hassle, so I’m told.

No matter, if it is impossible to stay in Costa Rica beyond the 4th of July, we’ll pack up the XT, and head north, to spend a leisurely return home….a week at the lake in Honduras, some time at the ruins in Copans, maybe another four-five days in Antigua de Guatemala….and then perhaps six-eight weeks in Puerto Escondido.

In the interim, I’m waiting for my good friend Paul to make his plans to come visit…and for those of you, my friends, who have been following this trip, we got the BIG HOUSE for a reason, ahem!   No reservations necessary…first come first serve!

Time will tell.   But we are here for now, enjoying the Pura Vida.  Join us if your schedule permits….I’m dying to cook for a crowd!

~ Blonde Gator

P.S.  XTerra has a slow leak in the left rear tire….we were feeling all superior about buying new tires…but I guess nails are everywhere (for you WM people, you know that to be a fact, LOL).

Lazy Sunday

Sunday, April 18th, 2010

We are sitting at the bar, waiting for the sunset (about ten minutes, from my reckoning).

I have uploaded some of our Antigua de Guatemala photos on their own page…until my computer got horsey and wouldn’t let me configure any more pictures to “large”.  As Blonde Mom says….”tomorrow’s another day, Scarlette”.

We went house hunting yesterday, I think we found our (more or less) permanent digs here….we hope to nail down the details tomorrow or Tuesday.  More on that once it’s confirmed.  Suffice it to say…we should have sufficient guest room(s).  Tomorrow we are taking our neighbor to the Liberia airport, and making a stop at the equivalent of Home Depot to pick up a few things.  Including gloves, I burned my fingers badly (like they stung for two days) dicing some frisky jalepenos.  I’ve come up with the Blonde Gator version of beans and rice (a staple everywhere we’ve been)….but mine rock.  I’ll get busy one of these days and post the recipe.  I’ve had beans and rice everywhere, Bahamas, Cuban Style, PR style, Mexican, Guatemalan, Honduran, Costa Rican, etc., but I like mine best  (Hint:  Bacon). 

Okies, the sun is about to sink, I think Iguana Man is down on the beach w/the camera.  Absolutely no clouds today (it rained all day yesterday…that is the nature of the place)….so it’s just a big red orb that drops faster than the Waterford Crystal ball on New Years. 

Hoping to finally see the “Green Flash”.

~ Blonde Gator

The Anti-Argh!

Friday, March 26th, 2010

Just got back from dinner (the killer robalo for the last time)….and opened my (now-functioning) e-mail.

I had a note from Blonde Mom…..guess what she deemed Obama?  (Mega Spew Alert)…..here’s exactly what she wrote:

   You never know when His Shitship will hit the TV.

Somebody call the paramedics, I’m dyin’ of laughter here!!!!